March Back…and Fourth!

It’s haiku time – mainly about cats!
Majestic feline,
queen of all she surveys:
a filthy bathroom
A blue tardigrade
peeks out of the blue coat hood
on a blue Monday
Window dreaming cat
it goes without saying that
Walter is naughty
Marmalade Harry
yawns majestically at
his adoring fans
Marmalade kitty
stares at his kick tube toy and
contemplates mayhem
Singing that old song:
“I’m leaving on a jet plane…”
Toob Cat sez: hoo carez?
Winging the way home
I didn’t want to come back…
Don’t jump off the plane!

Yesterday’s Lunch

Brought to you by the Smashing Meals Foundation.

Healthy for the body; healthy for the soul.

fully cooked and seasoned chicken breast on a paper plate that have been smashed with a human fist.
SMASHED CHICKEN BREASTS!!!

Need a healthy idea for lunch today? How about trying smashed chicken breasts! That’s right, you heard me: smashed chicken breasts!

And how does one prepare this culinary delight? Well, first you cook up a mess of chicken breasts, seasoned as you like’em in your crock pot (’cause you’re efficient that way) and then you store them in your refrigerator until you’re hankering for some chicken.

Once said hankering strikes, you put your precooked, chilled chicken breast in a baggie and then you smash the bejibbers out of it with your fist. That is correct – smash those bejibbers right out! Smash away for as long as you need to, until all those bejibbers be gone from your chicken breast(s).  You can use a different blunt instrument of your choice, if the fist is not sufficient to eradicate those pesky bejibbers.

Afterwards, you can either heat up your freshly smashed chicken breast (sans bejibbers) in the microwave, or you can eat it cold. You can use proper utensils, or just stuff that scrumptious protein straight into your mouth with your bare hands. It’s your prerogative, my friend.

Just make sure that you chew the chicken thoroughly before you swallow. We can’t have you choking on your food. 🙂

This recipe was brought to you by the Smashing Meals Foundation, courtesy of my stomach. Stay tuned for other “smashing” recipe ideas – guaranteed bejibbers-free!

Matches made in the toybox

TMNT and MLP #1

Imagine a cartoon crossover episode involving the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TMNT) and My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic (MLP:FiM).

Now, which pony character do you think would each of the TMNT characters choose for a mount?

The first pairing is obvious to me:

Major party animals coming our way!

Michelangelo

And Pinkie Pie. What mayhem

Shall ensue today?

TMNT & MLP haiku #1

Well, how about that? Do any of you have a “perfect pairing” in mind? You can use any characters in the TMNT (Nickelodeon CGI version) and the MLP:FiM universes. Please comment with your “character pair” and explain your reasoning – serious or hilarious, so long as it makes some sort of logical sense.

Stay tuned for more mash-up silliness!